Expectations Versus Reality

What is it about expectations? We all have expectations. We have expectations at work, with our families, our children, and certainly in our personal relationships. Even when we don’t get what we want, we still have expectations.  If we are used to having our way, we expect we will get what we want, and more.  

We can try to live without expectations, but try as we may, they still exist. We find that out whenever we are disappointed. We feel let down.  We begin to realize that it wouldn’t hurt so bad if we hadn’t expected something.  

How many times have we beat ourselves up for having an expectation? The truth is we are human beings who are designed to feel. We are designed to feel love, happiness, loss, grief, and even disappointment.  Remembering this we can let ourselves off the hook and stop judging ourselves for feeling the way we do.  

To avoid feeling frustrated, we tell ourselves not to expect anything and so we won’t be disappointed. This just leads to a life of mediocrity, feelings of complacency, and a deterioration of our motivation and excitement for life.  We lose our desire to live a life worth remembering.  

With each confirmation that we didn’t succeed, we give up wanting. Each time we give up, we numb our true self. Eventually we can’t even feel our feelings or desires and have little to live for. 

Expectations are a good thing.  We should have expectations. It even says so in the Bible; God meets us at our level of expectation.  If we expect little from life and from God, little is offered. If we dream big plans, expect great things, we are open to unlimited possibilities.

Are you blocking the flow of goodness in your life? What do you expect from life? What do you expect from yourself? From your partner? Do you expect miracles in your life? Are you expecting the right people to come into your life at the right time? 

We all want and expect good health. We want a vibrant body that everyday supports us by giving us legs to walk on. A body that gives us feet that take us anywhere we want to go. 

The key to successfully realizing our dreams is to take time to acknowledge that we indeed got what we wanted. We achieved what we set out to do. That a miracle we asked for, did take place. When we express our gratitude, we naturally attract more goodness in our life. It is then that we can expect wonderful things to come our way without being emotionally attached to the outcome.

Take it a step further and express your gratitude by doing something for another. Pledge everyday to do something nice for someone else, whether you know them or not.  Not only will you feel better about yourself, you are paying forward your gratitude to someone who was not expecting it.  

There is no better way to show your appreciation than by helping another to feel valuable, visible and loved. As you practice this everyday, your perception will adjust and your expectations will change. Being on the receiving end of helping another is a wonderful thing. Being on the giving end gives us purpose and a sense of belonging, a symbol of a well lived life.  


Janice Hoffman

February 3, 2008  

Edited December 14, 2008

Edited July 22, 2009   

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *